Barnstoneworth C vs Kariong

Barnstoneworth Over 35 C vs Kariong Match Report

Q: What do the Barnstoneworth 35Cs and the best place to snort cocaine off a hooker have in common? A: They’re both ‘off the bottom’ Yes, gentle reader, you read that aright. After a protracted period as pointless as the Eurovision Song Contest, we now have another 3 shiny points which doubles our total to […]

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Mountains vs Barnstoneworth C Match Report

What you are about to read may change your life. Do not adjust your set, but do pay attention because there will be a test at the end. If you had been there for the pre-match briefing (and frankly, why weren’t you? Did you have something better to do than stand about in thin mountains-issue […]

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BUFC C running out of time

Barnstoneworth C vs Ourimbah Match Report

There comes a time when even the strongest, most enthusiastic and motivated football team must eventually come to terms with the brutal truth of a cosmically indifferent universe. When their team is decimated by injury and the capriciousness of fate; when their entire division is made up of teams that have descended from on high […]

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Barnstoneworth C vs Mountains and Kariong

So there’s a couple of matches to tell you about, dear reader, but before we get into those Boy’s Own tales of sporting heroism, we must first pause and acknowledge with reluctance the retirement from the beautiful game of our long serving centre back Jason Horne. After putting his Herculean body on the line, often […]

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Match report for Umina vs Barnstoneworth C

Welcome back chaps. Here we go again. But before we get into it, may I respectfully request that you all assume the appropriate position, and sing the following lustily to the tune of your national anthem: ♫ Oh Barnstoneworth, proud Barnstoneworth Heroes in red and white We stride the field like mighty kings All other teams […]

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Barnstoneworth C vs Umina Report

Buoyed by our titanic winning performance midweek, The Legends returned in triumph to Terry Oval looking for their first win all season on that blessed turf. Our opponents were Umina, against whom we had previously had a draw that should have been a win, and a loss that should have been a draw. A pre-match […]

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Barnstoneworth C vs East Gosford – A tale of two matches!

Games against East Gosford are like hookers on a shady street; you wait ages for one, and then two come along in quick succession. Finally though, after rain enforced rearrangements of previously rearranged games, the two teams met last Saturday at Hylton Moore Oval. Last time out we had, it’s fair to say, handed their […]

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Field of Dreams

Barnstoneworth C vs Kariong Report

How you regard Saturday’s game against Kariong depends very much on which of the following philosophical standpoints most coincides with your world view : ‘Man that is born of woman hath but a short time to live, and is full of misery’ ‘It’s not a matter of life and death, it’s much more serious than […]

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Central Coast Soccer

Avoca vs Barnstoneworth C Match Report

Avoca players must wake up every morning, look at themselves in the mirror and think ‘Wow, another day as God’s gift to football and the human race generally, how amazing it is to be me.’ You may snigger at this, and you’d be right to, but how else to explain their breathtaking arrogance on the […]

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